acceptance · blog · brene brown · change · daring · daring greatly · grateful · growth · lessons · life · personal growth · self discovery · signs · truth · Uncategorized · wisdom

connect the dots

‘show me a sign’…part ‘duh!’

original post – https://startingoverat45.wordpress.com/2014/02/16/show-me-a-sign/

I am trying to show myself grace & know that although it may have been easy to see if you read that post, it took me until this morning in the shower to realize something.

I feel a bit like one of the victims in a horror movie…you know the one you want to scream at since they can not see what is so obvious to you.

I wrote….When you are stuck, you are a spectator and you are certainly not ‘Daring Greatly’.  Directly under that sentence I posted this:

daring greatly

I wish to amend that statement, I was avoiding the book not because I was a spectator but because I was actually on the ‘injured reserve’ roster.  Stuck?  Yes but funny how I was unable to recognize something important:

I did enter the arena.

I dared greatly

and I failed.

I know defeat and it hurt, it left me battered and wounded.

Instead of realizing that I did go into the arena, I just felt the defeat, the failure.

So there you have it.  That is really why the book sat collecting dust.

The struggle to heal & find the courage to somehow return to the arena when my last attempt didn’t end so well.

I needed time.

Time to ‘see the sign’ & then a little more time to ‘connect the dots’.

baby steps

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3 thoughts on “connect the dots

  1. This hit a nerve. I’m always in the arena, but not as the lion, more the lamb. I’m stupidly fearless weeping over hurt feelings on the hour. I too run away, hide in my room with the shades down till a scab forms, then I’ll jump back in to just have it happen again. The world is made of Teflon, me and from the sounds of it, you too, the kind of netting you put over a hat: fragile, delicate…eggshells in blogger’s clothing.
    I tell myself a zillion times a day…life’s short, think of all those you know who are dead…nothing in the end really matters much…puppy shit as I heard it put, amounts to zip as we’re taking our last breath.
    Loved the zing in the brevity. It’s an art you know, to compel and inspire in so few words.
    Susannah

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